saying goodbye...

saying goodbye is never easy. I still remember the first day when I was still a young budding teacher, the time when the kids waved goodbye to me, I felt so good. It was like being a mother waving goodbye to my children, that feeling was indescribable...But soon I began to lose this feeling. Saying goodbye seems to be everyday's routine. bye bye bye~

It is only until something happened to one of my pupils, that I have to show more concern to her. Human beings are such. We tends to take people for granted and forget about them. As much as I want to be a nice and caring teacher, sometimes I must admit I failed terribly in this area. I would be raged with anger and at that point in time, I would be very sure with my outburst and have every reasons to the things I've said or done. Thinking back, I indeed need to learn to be more caring and show more concern to these children.. afterall they are just 7 years old.

what happened to this pupil of mine I have to keep it confidential. It is really serious that I really felt so hurt. I don't know how to help her and I feel so helpless. It really sadden me especially when I see her still playing innocently with the other children. How I wish I could do something... this is the time when I suddenly stood out my own life and do my own reflection. What have I done to help these children? As much as I wanna believe school is getting tougher for these children, actually most of the time, school is the most reliable shelter they could seek. I feel so ashamed of myself.

I made a point to be more tolerant with what they did today. I even reward them one sweet each. Just one sweet, they give you their smiles and laughters. I walked my girl to the bus she's taking... she boarded the bus, turned and sat down. She gave me a smile and waved goodbye... My heart shattered.. =(

Dear God, please protect these children.